No one prepares a mother sufficiently for the extreme exhaustion that a new baby brings if they do not sleep well. You have my empathy. I’ve been there!
Research has determined that humans must sleep and, in fact, people can survive longer without food than without sleep. We must sleep in order to function and live. Falling asleep and waking up is largely determined by your circadian rhythm, a day-night cycle which develops around seven weeks of age. If this rhythm is not encouraged or is inhibited for some reason, it can take a lot longer to establish hence erratic sleeping patterns continue. Once your baby is about three weeks old, your aim is to be encouraging them with regular and balanced feed, play, sleep rhythms, where they start to settle themselves to sleep and sleep through at least one sleep cycle. This can prove difficult for some babies during their first four months for a number of reasons:
Tired signs are ignored, resulting in overtired
Getting up at the end of one sleep cycle, preventing a longer sleep
No sleep cues or aids are used
Over stimulation from extra visitors, noise, outings, fluorescent lighting and TV
Hungry
Overfed or fed too often
Mother and baby emotional issues and mix; tensions mimicked
Allergies and intolerances through breast milk or from infant formula
Growth spurts not understood or managed correctly
Lower bowel, abdominal, oesophageal pain or discomfort
Illness
It helps to understand and allow your baby’s getting to sleep process to progress. For a baby this takes about 10-20 minutes. It starts with showing tired signs then if all is well progresses to a vacant stare, drooping eyelids, and shut eyelids.
At an early age babies are starting to learn consequences, love and security which lead to healthy attachments and relationships in the future.How your baby goes off to sleep is one of the first associations you are teaching them. They are learning what to expect when they wake, stir and need to go back off to sleep. Seek help or support early with sleep issues before your sleep deprivation becomes dangerous for you and those around you.
If you like to include this article in your newsletter or website; you can, providing you include the following blurb with it:
This article was brought to you by Jan Murray, Private Child Health Consultant who is an internationally renowned expert in her field. Jan encourages parents in the area of infant sleep, nutrition, activities and family balance. She publishes regular ezine and blog articles to provide free parenting tips, tools and resources to educate and support those caring for young babies and children. For more online resources visit http://www.settlepetal.com
I know there are many parents out in the community tired due to their babies or toddlers not sleeping and stretched financially due to our economic times and I would like to help.
The CD “Putting them to Sleep” provides a stack of useful information (60 minutes worth) about sleep and how you can get more.
I am providing a massive clearance price of this CD as my way of contributing to the community.
Why not take advantage of this generous offer while it lasts, if not for you for a friend or neighbour who may be struggling and in need of some sound advice in the area of sleep and settling.
The word ‘Colic’ is a broad term used to label an unexplainable unsettled period that babies can experience. It is a time when all the techniques that had been working or could work to settle your baby are not working anymore.
Your baby is pulling their legs up and crying a desperate sounding cry. They may stiffen their back and not want to be cuddled. All the usual comforting measures are not working and your baby is getting more desperate.
This is a difficult time for most parents and not for just first time parents. You feel useless and hope that you aren’t missing something serious.
Often there is an explanation for pain but if it is misdiagnosed it can be just labelled ‘colic’.
Some causes of misdiagnosed ‘colic’ include:
* An overtired baby
* A growth spurt
* General evening ‘witching hour’ when your baby’s nervous system has been overstimulated with experiences during the day. This can occur until they are 9 weeks old
* An overfed or underfed baby
* No routine or satisfactory space between feeds to allow for digestion, activity and sleep.
* Smothered with love or over handled
* Suffer from allergies or intolerance to their diet (even if they are breast fed)
* Misread personality needs such as always holding them when they would like some space sprawled out on the floor.
How to help them:
Use ‘other methods’ of settling (see below) Relax in the thought that they will grow out of it. If the unsettled behaviour continues think about the list above and consider having your baby checked by your GP or other Child Health Professional as medication may be required for relief from Reflux.
‘Other Methods’ for settling:
* Use the pram to rock them off to sleep
* Use an electronic swing or a carry sling
* Give them a relaxation bath either on their own or in a deep one with you. Try putting a cup of camomile tea in the bath water and a warm washer over their tummy
* Extra breast feed or suck on a dummy
* Go out and meet someone or take a brisk walk with them in a stroller or sling
* Lay down with them and hold them tight
* Loud ‘white noise’ or music playing
or whatever else you might think would work for your baby, making sure to take their personality into consideration?
Try and stay calm yourself and always give your baby to the one who is the calmest. If you have a network of friends and family around you, don’t be too proud to ask for help. You will benefit from a break.
As a Midwife and Child Health Nurse who works closely with babies and children from birth to 5 years old, I have some useful insight into the use of dummies for babies that I would like to share with you. The decision to use one or not will be up to you. Not all babies take to sucking a dummy but there are certainly babies in the world who do benefit from sucking one. Once you have heard my findings the decision to use one or not will then be up to you.
Six positive reasons for a baby to use a dummy
1. Babies who are three to four weeks old who have learnt to attach and feed well from the breast but think they should feed constantly. In this situation, the breast feeding mother and her nipples could do with some relief and possibly repair from constant sucking. It is however, important not to substitute a breast feed for a dummy as this can reduce milk production resulting in an undernourished and unsettled baby
2. A baby sucking a dummy can reduce tummy discomfort, cranial pressure and wind pain until the cause of the pain and discomfort is diagnosed and relieved. However, by aiding the digestive process this then can cause them to become hungrier earlier
3. Sucking a dummy can reduce the pain of oesophageal reflux allowing for a bit more sleep!
4. Recent knowledge indicates a baby sucking a dummy can reduce the incidence of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). This is thought to be due to a baby being in a more alert state of sleep and having their airways in a more open position allowing for better air entry. There are also other factors relating to the reduction of SIDS
5. Premature babies are given dummies to help them suck when they are fed via a tube and to stimulate their suck before they are able to breast feed efficiently
6. A baby who settles to sleep best with a sucking action. Commonly, a baby who is fed either breast milk or infant formula from a bottle requires a dummy to build up the length of sucking time they require in a day
Seven reasons why a baby is disadvantaged using a dummy.
1. There is an increased risk of bacterial infections from dirty dummies. Sterilise them regularly and throw out any that have cracks or worn areas where bacteria can settle
2. The continued use of a dummy after three or four months can set up strong sleep associations that can lead to unsettled sleep in the months that follow
3. The regular and frequent use of a dummy has been shown to decrease the length of time a woman will continue to breast feed
4. A young baby who sucks too often on a dummy can be too tired for nutritional breast feeding
5. The use of a dummy after nine months can not only disturb good sleep patterns but it can also interrupt speech development
6. Choking hazard from faulty or worn out dummies
7. Sucking on a dummy when your baby could be awake and babbling restricts the natural development of language
Which dummy do we choose?
There are many dummies on the market and it can be difficult to know which one is best. Consider one that closely mimics your breast nipple.
1. Look for the dummy that is soft and supple. The brown latex rubber is usually the softest
2. Choose a shape that is similar to your nipple, this is usually the round cherry or bulb shaped dummy. Large or small
3. It needs to be large enough to reach back into the back of your baby’s mouth. This will depend on the size of your baby
With the above information in mind, I believe there can be a place for dummies for some babies, providing that it is an appropriate dummy used at an appropriate time and only for the first three to four months of life when a baby’s strong sucking reflex is present. After this age they discover other ways to soothe themselves and dummies can be discarded.
If you like to include this article in your newsletter or website; you can, providing you include the following blurb with it:
This article was brought to you by Jan Murray, Private Child Health Consultant who is an internationally renowned expert in her field. Jan encourages parents in the area of infant sleep, nutrition, activities and family balance. She publishes regular ezine and blog articles to provide free parenting tips, tools and resources to educate and support those caring for young babies and children. For more online resources visit http://www.settlepetal.com
With today’s knowledge on SIDS, it is safer to sleep young babies on their back and not on their tummy. For this reason, it is important to give your baby a snug and secure feeling in another way; swaddling.
Three misconceptions about swaddling a baby:
1. They don’t like their hands wrapped up tight
2. They fight the wrap when I put them in it
3. They are struggling to get free
Three benefits to swaddling a baby my way:
1. Their hands are wrapped and placed in a natural position (you will notice that your baby places their hands on the chest when you have them lying contented and unwrapped on their back)
2. Wrap them securely before their nervous system is out of control and over loaded
3. Once they are asleep it prevents the startle reflex waking them between sleep cycles; allowing for a longer more settled sleep
Swaddling a baby to aid in them having a settled sleep is appropriate until they are 6 months old.
The swaddling technique shown in this video is appropriate until a baby is 3 months old, after that you can leave their arms free of the wrap which allows a baby to be able to suck their fist or fingers to self settle.
You can help your child make the transition from a cot to a bed when you and your child are ready. You will find this transition is the easiest to manage after your child turns 2 years old.
Below are some signs that indicate that it is time for your infant to move out of their cot.
·Climbs or falls head first out of their cot
·Thrashes around in their cot and seems unable to get comfortable
·Asks you for a “big bed”
·When they are toilet trained by day and then start to call out at night to use the toilet
· A new baby coming and the cot will be needed
Suggestions that can help your child move out of a cot and into a bed…
·Make the changes when there are no other changes happening in the child’s life
·If another baby is on the way, make the changes at least 2 months before or after their arrival
·They may like to help you chose the sheets
·Idea 1: Take away the cot surrounds and place the cot mattress on the floor in the same spot for a few days or a week before changing into the bed
·Idea 2: Bring the big bed into the same room as the cot, leaving cot assembled and start day naps and reading books on their new bed for a week before sleeping in it
·Have a calm and comforting pre-bedtime routine established before making the transition
·Have some of this on the big bed reading or chatting
·Tuck them in and ensure they know you expect them to stay in bed
·If they get out of bed, take their hand and walk them back to bed calmly and confidently, with no eye contact or conversation. Continue walking them back in this manner until they stay there. Do this consistently for 3 weeks before a new habit is established.
This video clip shows what can happen when an older baby (about 7 – 8 months ) gets over tired.
At this stage they are much harder to settle to sleep.
Give yourself a helping hand by understanding tired signs and acting on them appropriately.
To help you understand what tired signs are, when they are likely to happen and what to do about them I have written down my tried and tested theories and knowledge in an eBook for you to download and read. It is available here
Did you realise that the first 6 - 8 weeks of your baby’s life is the most important time to avoid a flattened head area developing in your baby.(Plagiocephalie)
Plagiocephalie can develop after birth from your baby applying constantpressure on one part of their head.
This is due to the bones of a newborn baby’s head being thin and flexible and the head being soft and easy to mould.
Flat areas may happen when:
1. Lying in one position for long periods of time (such as on their back while they sleep)
2. By always turning their head to the same side when lying on their back (favouring looking at a window of light)
3. Always sitting in a propped up position; occurring in babies who suffer from Reflux
4. Birth trauma resulting in neck pain; leaving the baby to favour a pain free position
Some important steps that you can do to facilitate a baby developing muscle balance and decrease the risk of developing a flattened head area.
1. Alternate their head position when putting them down in their sleeping area
2. Alternate putting them at different ends of the cot when putting them to bed.
3. A period of tummy time during every play time.
4. Change the position of their toys when they are on the floor so they move their head to different angles.
5. Vary their holding and carrying positions
6. Changing the side that you wear a baby carry sling on
7. When picking your baby up, approach them from different sides of their body.
8. An appointment with a baby accredited Chiropractor
or Physiotherapist maybe necessary to assess your baby’s head alignment.
It is not unusual for babies to need a gentle adjustment after
a Caesarean birth, forceps assisted birth, breech birth and prolonged 2nd stage.
Babies who do not feed well from a particular side, hate tummy time or have considerable gas may have an alignment issue requiring attention.
Seek professional help EARLY if you see that your baby’s head is becoming flattened in areas. A physiotherapist may need to fit a cranial helmet if the head remains flat past 5-6 months.
Information on ‘Plagiocephalie’ came across my desk
from the Plagiocephalie Clinic at the Mater Children’s Hospital , Brisbane.
“Research is showing that baby’s that remain
with marked plagiocephalie may skip crawling
and have slower milestones with motor skills.
As they get older they may have reduced ability
with mathematics and in particular judging distances”.
Food can have a significant calming effect on a body or an energizing effect. When you have children who do not sleep well, it is useful to understand what type of food fuels energy and what food fuels the release of sleep inducing hormones serotonin and melatonin.
The effect foods have on the body begins to occur about 30 minutes after they are eaten therefore it is beneficial to give a young child an appropriate snack or drink 30 minutes before you expect them to be asleep. This does not mean holding off their dinner but rather giving them a little something extra as well.
Red meat, sausages, ham, simple carbohydrates such as white rice, potatoes and white bread, butter and sugary foods are best given earlier in the day to avoid the increased energy effect. Brown rice and wholegrain bread are even better choices for helping a child sustain their energy levels.
Foods that contain the amino acid tryptophan are suitable for a child’s evening meal and pre bedtime snack because they promote sleep and control hunger. Here is a list of some dinner or evening snack suggestions for your child.
1. Wholegrain cereal with warm milk
2. Natural yoghurt and sliced apple
3. Wholegrain rice cake spread with avocado
4. Melted hard cheese on wholegrain toast
5. Cashew or peanut butter spread on a dry wholegrain and oat wheat-bix
6. Cottage cheese and tuna with avocado
7. Eggs and wholegrain toast fingers
8. Rice pudding made with brown rice
These foods not only encourage calmness and sleep but they are easily digested allowing the body to be resting rather than digesting a heavier meal overnight. Perhaps this information on food is worth thinking about for your own adult diet and not just that of your children.
A baby has many different sleeping options but how can a parent make a decision about what is the best option for their new baby?
Over the years I have visited many families that were faced with a variety of challenges after their baby was born. From these I have put together some ideas that are worth thinking about before making a decision on your baby’s sleeping area:
1. Do you want them in your bedroom with you? If so, what size bassinette or basket will comfortably fit in your bedroom?
2. How will you teach your child to sleep in a still bed after they have learnt to sleep swinging in a hammock?
3. You have a cot/crib already but it seems too big for a newborn. Consider putting a ‘Snuggle Bed’ inside the cot/crib until they are bigger.
4. You love the thought of your baby sleeping in the parental bed with you but this is unadvisable if either parent is obese, smokes or takes drugs.
5. The baby’s room is a long way from your room and you are afraid that you won’t hear them cry. Consider using a baby monitor or bringing their bassinette/basket closer to your room temporarily.
6. Is the baby’s room going to be cold because it gets little sun and they are due to be born in winter? Consider another room for the first 3 months.
7. Is their sleeping area bright during the day because it has light curtains and direct sunlight? Babies will sleep better after 6 weeks if the lighting is dim.
8. Is the nursery room is upstairs but you will be downstairs most of the day consider setting up two sleeping areas (one upstairs and one downstairs) for the first 3 months. The downstairs option could be a port-a-cot or pram/stroller.
9. You have animals and other children that will open the door and wake them up. Consider a gate on the doorway or a latch high up to secure the door shut.
10. Often a father can be away a lot for work and the mother brings the baby into her bed to sleep. When the father returns home there is minimal privacy as the baby will no longer sleep in their cot/crib. Consider the sleep associations that your baby is learning to go off to sleep with.
Parents are always learning about parenting issues. By considering these challenges that some parents have had could help you establish good sleeping patterns early for your baby.
