August 24, 2008
Parenting
1 Comment
Dads have a vital role to play in the parenting of their children. By getting involved and learning new skills in the practicalities of parenting you will be rewarded and have more fun.
Is this what changing nappies is like for you?
No longer do Dads just have to be the hunter, gatherer, provider but he can play, tickle, laugh, rumble and change nappies too. Yes, there may not be as much of this as mum has to do, but it can still happen. Learn the fine art of bathing and massaging your baby and you will be rewarded in more ways than you can imagine. It is OK to feel awkward as you begin to master these new skills; just laugh it off, your baby will like it better that way anyway!
If you bond and build relationships with your babies and children while they are young by reading with them on your knee, telling stories that encapture your child’s imagination and comfort them when they hurt, you will stand a better chance of them obeying you when they are older. It may be too late to start building relationships with them then!!
I do believe men are the ones that can play best with their children but dads do have to have a balance and instill rules and respect discipline and routine as well. There is a serious side to parenting that makes for family harmony in the long run.
Dads, get committed and get involved with the life of a dad and get rewarded with emotions that you never realised you had or that you even thought were possible. If you did not have a dad that played and got involved in your childhood, don’t let that stop you from starting. Find a mentor and watch what they do with their family.
Jan www.settlepetal.com
August 9, 2008
Toddler
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“My 16month old son Blake, who, to date, I have had not one day of angst with, has started hitting me, particularly in the face when I pick him up. I have chosen to ignore it as advice from everyone from my mum to friends is ‘he doesn’t understand what he is doing”
For those of you who have a toddler in the house, you may have experienced similar behaviour. Toddlers are a fascinating age where they are demonstrating their feelings in an outward manner. Often we do not know exactly what they are frustrated or angry about but we can usually get a fair idea. It can be when you are interrupting them or taking them away from something that they are enjoying or when you try to get them to do something that they don’t want to do. They are demonstarting that they are growing up and that they are wanting to make their own decisions.
The best response that I have found with this behaviour in a young toddler is to put them down and ignore them. In this case, I do believe they know what they are doing but it is with your response that they learn. If they continually get no response at all either negative or positive they will soon find it a pointless exercise to continue. Be understanding when they lash out at you for interrupting them from something important. Leave them to cope with their reaction to frustration.
This VIDEO CLIP is a great example of a toddler waiting for a response!!
Press here for TANTRUM
You will notice different personalities will react differently to frustrating situations. It is important to remember that it is during these toddler years that they are learning to understand their emotions and response to their behaviours.
My “Being a Toddler” eBook looks at the life of a toddler. More information is available from the link below
Speak soon
Jan http://www.settlepetal.com
August 9, 2008
Baby behaviour
1 Comment
From about 4 months of age babies often find it distracting to feed as they are stimulated by activity around them, however, a significant intake per feed is important at this young age otherwise a snack feeding pattern may establish which can interfere with their sleep.
You may need to feed in a quieter place for a while but at least it usually doesn’t take them very long (5-10minutes) to complete a feed. The feed should last them close to 4 hours.
At 6 months your baby will often start to refuse feeding from the breast or taking their bottle. Babies at this age change their sleeping, feeding and playing patterns from a young baby to an older more alert baby routine.
If your baby has started solids and they are having a satisfying amount, then it is understandable that they will not require or want as much milk. This is OK providing they are getting nutrients from food.
This is part of what introducing solids is all about. Babies that are refusing the breast or bottle and are not having solids can be telling you that they are ready to move on from liquid and want more variety. They are growing up!
Due to the stages of a baby’s development, introducing texture and finger foods is more likely to be successful if this is started at around 7-8 months. A baby obviously needs time to progress to this stage.
‘Starting Solids & Food Antics’ eBook discusses more about food
“I am Nearly 6 Months Old” eBook discusses other significant changes that a 6 month old may experience.
Jan
http://www.settlepetal.com
August 9, 2008
Sleep and Settling
5 Comments
“……her night waking is really upsetting the whole home - and its not fair on our 4 year old.” I frequently hear this from parents every week. How many of you with babies over 7 months have said that to someone or have heard it said?
There are many reasons why babies wake from this age onward and how we assist them to get back off to sleep will always be specific to each individual situation. It is a very controversial and delicate issue but after many years of watching baby behaviour and the dilemma of what sleep strategy to use I have a few suggestions.
Firstly, if a baby is waking frequently overnight or not going to sleep they need to be checked by a health professional to confirm that there is no underlying health issues to prevent them sleeping. To be honest, most babies at this age will check out fine which could indicate that it is a maternal or family behavioural issue or a sleep association habit in a baby. If this wakeful and unsettled behaviour continues, a baby can become quite clingy and whingy and they may develop colds and other illnesses. They are often reluctant to entertain themselves and explore their world independently. Parents tire of this demanding behaviour leading to emotional exhaustion and anxiety. It is this long term effect on families and a baby’s development that I believe is important and why a baby should be encouraged to sleep well as early as possible.
There are several strategies that parents can use to help their baby sleep; one of them commonly known as ’controlled crying’ gets a bad wrap. In my opinion and experience this method is very effective if done in a specific way and used with an appropriate age related routine. The parent putting their baby to sleep, needs to be emotionally strong and confident and consistent for it to be an effective settling method. If this method is having no results at all after 2-3 days it should be discontinue and the infant reassessed.
How families’ parent is very individual and providing there is no neglect on one end and no abuse on the other, there is a lot of room for variety. Some parents are comfortable with ‘attachment parenting’ while others find this too smothering to be effective. These parents prefer to encourage an earlier independence in their babies. It is the emotional health of each individual and a family’s ability to function effectively in an environment of love and peace that is most important.
I have a 44 page eBook “Putting them to Sleep” which discusses sleep and a variety of options for getting babies and young children to sleep. You can download it from the link below
http://www.settlepetal.com/products/Putting-them-to-Sleep-eBook.html
The same information that is printed in the eBook is also available on audio CD. Preview a short chapter 07-settling-techniques from the ‘Putting them to Sleep” audio CD available from the website below.
Speak soon
Jan http://www.settlepetal.com
August 6, 2008
Sleep and Settling
1 Comment
I have been working with a mum and her 8 week old baby today.
This wonderful mum has read all the books on settling and is following what the books say to do but nothing seems to be working.
Unfortunately when a baby remains unsettled for too long a mum loses her self confidence in being able to get her baby to sleep and the baby picks up on those emotions and then doesn’t want to settle at all. It becomes a cycle that can be difficult to break without support and direction. I know this mum’s situation is not an isolated case as I have met many others experiencing the same.
Every baby is different and often babies require different ways to settle for different reasons and therefore parents need to do what feels comfortable for them within the guidance of books and information.
When all the strategies you read and hear fail just relax and love them, hug them close near your heart, sing or hum (calms you and baby) or play some soothing music or white noise loudly, you won’t spoil them and remember that tomorrow is another day.
Jan http://www.settlepetal.com
August 4, 2008
Baby behaviour
2 Comments
If you ask my children what they say about me and TV they will say I am the television nazi. I wasted so many of my childhood years eating my life away infront of the TV growing fat and apathetic that I now hate everything about it.
The occasional movie is great but there are so many other shows that lure you to sit and while away the hours which I believe are destroying a parent’s motivation and self esteem. Of course it is not just adults that suffer the negative effects of TV but babies, infants and children are effected in many ways too.Children sit relaxed and quiet, mesmerized by the action on the TV to then develop into fighting aliens when it is turned off. A child’s behaviour is far more disobedient, whingy and intolerant when the TV is turned off, that it makes you wonder whether it is worth while having it on at all.
Children who watch a lot of television are not developing the imaginary half of their brain to it’s full potential and this is becoming more and more evident in the school classroom. Students who have not developed the ability to think and problem solve get easily distracted and misbehave.
Encouraging children with creative games and books will go a long way towards helping them learn in the classroom.
Even before preschool television can create negative behaviours. The imaging that creates the colour and pictures on an electronic screen, keep the brain waves firing, creating sleep disturbances and the ability to wind down and sleep is slowed.
Try turning the media off for the 11/2 hours prior to your children’s bedtime and see if it has a settling effect on your family.
Jan
http://www.settlepetal.com
August 4, 2008
Nutrition
1 Comment
I find myself saying “yes”, to many distraught parents when they ask if I believe that foods effect behaviour in babies. Even with all the information on food additives, preservatives and flavourings effecting child behaviour there are still GP’s out there that deny any connection when it comes to breast feeding.
Without a doubt, I have seen the positive effects in babies after removing certain suspect foods from a breast feeding womans diet. Even though it can take a good 6 weeks before an infant is rid of the effects of an offending food the positive changes can usually be seen within 24 - 48 hours.
Nasty Additives to avoid include:
COLOURS: 102,104,107,110,122,123,124,127,128,129,132,133,142,151,155
Natural Colour 160b (annatto), Artificial Sweeteners: 951
PRESERVATIVES: 200-203, 210-213, 220-228, 249-252, 280-283 (bread preservative)ANTIOXIDANTS: 310-312, 319-321, 330
FLAVOUR ENHANCERS: including MSG 620-625, 627, 631, 635
Yeast extract, Hydrolysed Vegetable Protein (HVP)
ARTIFICIAL FLAVOURS No numbers since they are trade secrets Taken from www.fedupwithfoodadditives.com
A breast feeding women’s diet is very important to the wellbeing of both the woman and their baby therefore elimination diets should only be undertaken with professional guidance.
Has anybody any interesting experiences with food to shar?.
Written by Jan Murray Registered Nurse, Midwife, Child Health Nurse, wife and mother.
View more at http://www.settlepetal.com
August 3, 2008
Uncategorized
4 Comments
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